Fall for you

Fav drink of 2008

2009-01-03T22:20:00.003+08:00

LEMON LIME BITTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Civic R

2009-01-03T22:12:00.002+08:00

civic type R cost AUD 39k here omfg..........

how cheap can it be....comparatively to prices in SG....

somebody buy me a car here ?

27 days to HOME and to the ones i love (:

'08

2008-12-28T06:01:00.000+08:00

Another year is gonna be gone and i must say 2008 passed very quickly as now I am a month away from completing my foundation...

X'mas 08 was boring...didn't really do anything much, and yes i know my girl didnt do anything much as well..so we're all in the same boat (:

This year is a special year, because in 2008, my relationship grew and strengthened more than ever, despite being seperated in 2 countries. Because of all the things that actually happened, good and bad, it led us down this road of inseparable love and companionship

Apart from relationship, my mum and me are able to communicate much better now, family ties are strengthened too.

And friends, i have made some awesome friends in Melbourne, but that doesn't mean i've forgotten about my friends in Singapore. Trust me, i didnt forget u all even though we didnt talk much in these 6 months. I'll be back for some crazy times and catching up on all your lifes.

As I always say, the new year is the new beginning (:

Welcome 2009!

2008-11-12T22:01:00.002+08:00

did i say i was a science student? YES I AM A BLOODY SCIENCE STUDENT! why do i have to write essays on racism which is totally irrelevant to what i am going to study in future?? argh!

i was never good at essays, any kind. my GP was alway stuck at C5 and arts subjects arent my best..i wonder how am i gonna survive if im to enter commerce next year.. zzz

have been feeling rather home sick the past few days...quite a lot of regrets etc hope i really get out of it soon..its only 2 mths left..!

im lacking behind in every preparation for my upcoming papers, im screwed, or rather im gonna get screwed SO BADLY!

im gonna go get some sleep and hope i finish HOI by tml..word limit is 1600 words, im at....58 words...............................................................................

2008-11-04T20:21:00.002+08:00

4 months gone, 3 months to go.

well guys, if u all see the previous post, the plan DIDN'T work out.. well i guess i'll try again this week..ahaha

I HAVE SO MANY THINGS I WANNA DO, BUT NOT ENOUGH MONEY TO DO THEM ):

sigh please someone give me a lecture on being contented NOW!

less than 3 weeks til exams...its crazy times again with HOI essay and 2 papers coming up

i've been wondering these days, what would i do the night i touch down?

would i be busy catching up with family? or would i be busy out raping hawker food? or....?

anyways, i jus wish i can be back earlier..miss my baby girl ):

well well..baby's coming over for a mth next year march and we have a hk trip planned in july don't we (:

2008-10-26T20:29:00.002+08:00

im broke..really broke..oh my god ):

and as usual, i procrastinate like crazy..so here's a short list of things i should DO!

1. Drink ONLY water
2. Run at least 3 times a week
3. Get started on my tutorials
4. Minimal expenditure

yesss......i must follow strictly to my list...grrr

anyways, Melbourne is really very boring..sigh, if i had money to spend on shopping, maybe it'd be different story BUT the fact that i don't makes melbourne boring x 2.

so boring that i have nothing else on my mind that i want to blog about..shall blog another time!

2008-10-20T17:13:00.000+08:00

i stared into the sky while the sun set, and i wondered, who am i?

2008-10-19T20:30:00.002+08:00

its been 3 mths plus since i left Singapore..am pretty much used to life here in Melbourne, but i've not forgotten my life in Singapore.

there are times whereby when im lying on my bed with my eyes closed, memories rush pass my mind..good times, bad times..army..studying..getting into a relationship..etc

I am the result of my past, forged by my experiences. Was i a good person, a good son, a good brother, a good boyfriend, a good friend?

Did i make an impact on anyone's life? Did i help to change someone's life for the better?

oh well i guess i know best, to all these questions that i ask..

.Are you there?.

2008-10-19T06:34:00.000+08:00

I miss you...

Term 1 results

2008-10-16T08:23:00.002+08:00

Term 1 results

Literature: 10/15

History of ideas: 16.75/20

Drama: 8.5/10

Math 1: 91/100

Math 2: 70/100

Physics: 97/100

2008-10-16T08:12:00.002+08:00

ok..im here to blog about... JAY CHOU'S NEW ALBUM ((:

here's one song that i like:

稻香

对这个世界如果你有太多的抱怨
跌倒了就不敢继续往前走
为什麽人要这麽的脆弱堕落
请你打开电视看看
多少人为生命在努力勇敢的走下去
我们是不是该知足
珍惜一切就算没有拥有
还记得你说家是唯一的城堡
随着稻香河流继续奔跑
微微笑小时候的梦我知道
不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑
乡间的歌谣永远的依靠
回家吧回到最初的美好

不要这麽容易就想放弃就像我说的
追不到的梦想换个梦不就得了
为自己的人生鲜艳上色先把爱涂上喜欢的颜色
笑一个吧功成名就不是目的
让自己快乐快乐这才叫做意义
童年的纸飞机现在终於飞回我手里
所谓的那快乐赤脚在田里追蜻蜓追到累了
偷摘水果被蜜蜂给叮到怕了谁在偷笑呢
我靠着稻草人吹着风唱着歌睡着了
哦哦午后吉它在虫鸣中更清脆
哦哦阳光洒在路上就不怕心碎
珍惜一切就算没有拥有

还记得你说家是唯一的城堡
随着稻香河流继续奔跑
微微笑小时候的梦我知道
不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑
乡间的歌谣永远的依靠
回家吧回到最初的美好
还记得你说家是唯一的城堡
随着稻香河流继续奔跑
微微笑小时候的梦我知道
不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑
乡间的歌谣永远的依靠
回家吧回到最初的美好
所谓的那快乐赤脚在田里追蜻蜓追到累了
偷摘水果被蜜蜂给叮到怕了谁在偷笑呢
我靠着稻草人吹着风唱着歌睡着了
哦哦午后吉它在虫鸣中更清脆
哦哦阳光洒在路上就不怕心碎
珍惜一切就算没有拥有
还记得你说家是唯一的城堡
随着稻香河流继续奔跑
微微笑小时候的梦我知道
不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑
乡间的歌谣永远的依靠
回家吧回到最初的美好

Jay chou rocks xD

(my bloody internet cost 645 AUD this mth, nabei pukimak !@#!@!@#)

2008-10-13T21:22:00.001+08:00

I went to melbourne central and got this pair of audio tech EM 7 earphones (:
woo one thing off my list !

2008-10-04T21:24:00.003+08:00

whenever my friends express worries about getting into uni melb, i always say, dont worry we are going in for sure. and then they always ask me, how can u be so sure?

the thing is, yes, how can i, the person whom screwed up my A levels thrice be so sure that i'll be able to enter uni melb now? but think about it this way, we are in the fast track program, which doesnt gives us enough time to rest and stop. As much as we've been constantly studying, students all know that in a point of time no matter how much we've studied, we will start to get paranoid. In this phase, we have no extra energy and time for that. we need to be sure of our goal, of what we want and tell ourselves we'll get it this time. We are all here, why? cause we all know we screwed our A levels. this IS our last chance, we all know it too. we aint stupid, and now its time to show all others we are just as capable, if not even better. Since this is our last chance, im sure we will put in our utmost effort, which means yes see all of you in uni melb orientation next year :)

For my one and only most beloved-Samantha and my parents

2008-09-19T15:25:00.004+08:00

And the week passed so fast that its friday again, though theres nothing to be elated about especially the weekend is to be used for full bloom mugging.

and so i have finished 2 1200words essay and now im left with about 18 tutorials to finish by MONDAY!

the scary thing is, i have math 1 paper on monday, phy on wed and math 2 on thurs. well im not entirely confident of math 1 but at least i've finished the tutorials. as for Math 2 and physics, sadly i havent even start on any of them. BUT i hope the semi strong foundation of my phy will help me somewhat breeze through the 11 physics tutorials so that i have more time for the very very tough math 2 tuts.

my GOD we are all nerdified! can u imagine? im so gonna get myself a pair of nerd specs and wear it whenever exams are near to signify the nerd mode! its freaking crazy! but the upcoming 10 days holiday shall serve as a motivation and and and i hope my mum sends me more money cause i am seriously broke over here!

i've just received notice that the rent is gonna increase to 1373 next year..thats like what the hell! its so expensive and thats the price for a twin share at college square..omg zzz

my plans for the holidays are simple. sleep no less than 12 hours a day. for the first two hibernate and then for the remaining 8 days i shall embrace myself with a ultra slow pace life, or rather an ah pek's life..ahaha

its a shame. sometimes it isnt the religion's fault, the fault falls on some who worship the religion.

We do not know what lies ahead, but together you and me, we shall open the doors which leads to a future with us :)

2008-09-14T21:04:00.002+08:00

never would i imagine myself spending my whole weekend studying from the time i wake up til i sleep, it has been like what 4 years since i last schooled ? and mind you 4 years ago although i was in school i didnt really care much. Thus explaining the difficulty im facing right now, getting all not used to prolong period of chionging.

progress is still not bad right now, having cleared most of my math 1 tutorials. now i have math 2 and phy left, as well as 2 essays whereby i will complete one of them by tml..

everything just seem more difficult ever. and i mean everything. i've been revealed to a new self, somebody whom i'd never imagine myself to be. It is a good change, i feel, although sometimes i am still drawn to my old self. the thing is, am i the only one making the change ? its so tough whenever i think about that.

i feel that if a particular issue or something is of utmost importance, one will do it asap. at least that's how i deal with stuff now, particularly in the relationship part. is it wrong to expect the same ? or is my mentality wrong?

i've had enough bullshit of the old lovely puppy love. I give, and most of the time i seek at least a sign that its worth what i do, whether it helps, or whether it is appreciated. i know i know, so many people will say that stuff are done not for appreciation. then i can only say fuck off man seriously. what world are u living in that allows you to be so ideal and naive? i mean, no offence but im way pass that age already. there has to be a purpose for everything we do, the things we do, no matter what must or should lead to greater things in future to happen. we are indirectly paving our own future and our life from what we are doing now. And from then we expect and look forward to the day we reap our rewards (in whichever context).

however realistic i've become, there is always that special someone whom will convince me that fairytales still exists. someone to convince me and make me feel like it is ok to take a break from reality and just indulge in the world we once believed. i would, gladly cause it is with you. now matter how screwed up this world is and will become, we will walk life together, complementing each other and add colours to this grey world. I jus wish that you understand it is not a good day for me everyday and i hope that at days when im down you would be there to hear me rant and vent and tell me everything's gonna be okay. let me rest in your arms so that i will be prepared to go through another day in this twisted world.

Ups and downs are inevitable, it is just the way things are. But after going through the downs, there will always be the rainbow after the rain.

Always loving you..

2008-09-11T11:57:00.003+08:00

Sometimes when u look back, look at your own life, the things that you do and the way you live life and the ways your perceive things, you realize it isnt really the best way life should be. Wrong perceptions and mentalities might just lead to the wrong places.

I hold my morals close, but then i found out not all of my morals are applicable. Sometimes, it just doesnt pay to be nice. Friends in particular. Sometimes, we all need some filtering system in us, filter our friends and decide for ourselves who are those friends that really care and give a shit to whatever that happens to you. Apparently, and sadly in reality, not all friends are like that. Some are just unbelievably scheming and yes they do have a purpose to be your friend, more of a negative purpose. I have many a times pretend as if nothing happened, tell myself its just the way they are. But after all that has happened, i've learnt so much. One of the things i've came to realize is, girlfriend is definitely more important that my friends, any of them. Sorry no offence but, if the importance of a girlfriend and friends are really the same, why bother getting into a relationship. Obviously she/he is someone really important and someone whom u would want to be together with, thus this says pretty much why our partners are more important than our friends.

There are friends whom want the best for you, and there are friends whom want something from you. Needless to say, i would gladly choose the former.

我，宁可杀错，不可放过。

属于我们的幸福，我不会让任何人抢走。

分分钟需要你

2008-09-07T10:17:00.003+08:00

heres a canto oldie that my sis sent me, the rhythm of the song is very light hearted and the lyrics are meaningful.

Here is the original lyrics:

愿我会揸火箭带你到天空去
在太空中两人住
活到一千岁都一般心醉
有你在身边多乐趣
共你双双对好得尺好得意
地暗天昏当闲事
就算翻风雨只需睇到你
似见阳光千万里
有了你开心d 乜部都称心满意
咸鱼白菜也好好味
我与你永共聚分分钟需要你
你似是阳光空气
扮靓d皆因你癫癫地皆因你
为你甘心做傻事
扮下猩猩叫睇到乜都笑
有你在身边多乐趣
若有朝失左你花开都不美
愿到荒岛去长住
做个假的你天天都相对
对木头公仔做戏

Dedicated to Samantha Louise my love :)

会呼吸的痛

2008-08-31T11:05:00.000+08:00

在东京铁塔　第一次眺望
看灯火模仿　坠落的星光
我终於到达　但却更悲伤
一个人完成　我们的梦想

你总说　时间还很多
你可以等我
以前我不懂得
未必明天　就有以后

想念是会呼吸的痛
它活在我身上所有角落
哼你爱的歌会痛
看你的信会痛　连沉默也痛

遗憾是会呼吸的痛
它流在血液中来回滚动
后悔不贴心会痛
恨不懂你会痛
想见不能见最痛

没看你脸上　张扬过哀伤
那是种多么　寂寞的倔强
你拆了城墙　让我去流浪
在原地等我　把自己捆绑

你没说　你也会软弱
需要依赖我
我就装不晓得
自由移动　自我地过

想念是会呼吸的痛
它活在我身上所有角落
哼你爱的歌会痛
看你的信会痛　连沉默也痛

遗憾是会呼吸的痛
它流在血液中来回滚动
后悔不贴心会痛
恨不懂你会痛
想见不能见最痛

我发誓不再说谎了
多爱你就会抱你多紧的
我的微笑都假了
灵魂像飘浮着　你在就好了

我发誓不让你等候
陪你做想做的无论什么
我越来越像贝壳
怕心被人触碰　你回来那就好了

能重来那就好了

whats up man

2008-08-29T15:53:00.003+08:00

this week sucked big time, apart from getting back grades and reports, another thing on my mind is bothering me.

talking about the reports, im seriously screwed man. im sure my mum's gonna notice the number of classes i was absent and i'll have a lot to exlain zz ..

my grades are bad, for lit and EAP that is..need to do something about my english if not i can kiss my lit and hoi results good bye.

the whole reject thing just cant get out of my mind, seriously i dont know how is it gonna be done, whats gonna be said etc. my friend says it isnt always so direct, abit of hope will be left with the other party, that is so so not what i want. is that how we deal with things like that? goodness this is bad

well on another note, being so far away isnt helpful and yup there is absolutely nothing i can do about it. humans are complex, much more complex than the word complex itself, the thinking feeling and behaviour is really weird. well i'll know how it goes after a while i guess.

am still pondering about the whole issue about relationships. the issue is still as complex. this week has been so hectic, hopefully this weekend will serve as a good time to reflect and think about stuff.

til then, its loads and tonnes of work to be done.

madness

2008-08-23T14:41:00.002+08:00

oooh ok. so my attendance has fallen to 73% and IF i miss any more classes its warning letter to parents number 1..zz

oh well..i have been diligently attending every class and goodness exams are in a mth's time..to think about it, i have everything to catch up on which means EVERYTHING!

i have to score exceptionally well for the sept exam cause all the tutors will write a report on every individual student and they will mail it back to our parents in sept. That implies that i wouldnt get very positive remarks and hopefully i can achieve crazily high scores so that my mum's eyes will be glued to the marks rather than the remarks and attendance!

Also, i have to do well so that you can come over in DEC! :)

my finances are running incredibly low and its only the 2nd month! arghh

its back to math tut again!

约定

2008-08-16T12:20:00.000+08:00

远处的钟声回荡在雨里
我们在屋檐底下牵手听
幻想教堂里头那场婚礼
是为祝褔我俩而举行

一路从泥泞走到了美景
习惯在彼此眼中找勇气
累到无力总会想吻你
才能忘了情路艰辛
你我约定难过的往事不许提
也答应永远都不让对方担心
要做快乐的自己
照顾自己
就算某天一个人孤寂
你我约定一争吵很快要喊停
也说好没有秘密彼此很透明
我会好好的爱你
傻傻爱你
不去计较公平不公平

Fall for you

2008-08-16T01:01:00.001+08:00

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start
Ohhhh

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
'Cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find

Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

2008-08-13T21:47:00.002+08:00

i've seen a lot of things i fail to see, come to understand things i didnt..

sorry, so sorry i made u suffered so much,

以前的我不够好，但我会学习如何去爱你：）

2008-08-13T02:00:00.001+08:00

到底要怎么做，你才会回心转意？
我的生命给你，要不要？

2008-08-13T01:16:00.002+08:00

what happens when u cant sleep at night for 2 weeks ? u freaking go crazy!

nobody would understand what im going, not you, not you also, and definitely not you.

oh my goodness...i cant believe what i've become. this is seriously really very very very very very annoying and irritating and tiring and torturing and everything!

how long more, how long more must i go through this???????????????????????

2008-08-10T15:00:00.000+08:00

I love myself.

2008-08-09T15:39:00.002+08:00

this year is really full of crap, worst year ever.

just so many bad things are happening, goodness!

its Singapore's national day today.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!

AND, its also Grace's birthday, HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY GRACE (:(:

life is not as simple as it used to be. back when we were schooling, everything was so simple. until we grow up, we are exposed to so many other things in life, to reality...perspective changed, mind changed, heart changed..

matters of the heart are complicated and far more complex than we thought, why cant people just be honest to themselves and others? it really makes things much easier..

everything about life is gonna be tough, so many things we cant foresee and predict.

hang in there everyone, we all need our space and personal time, give yourselves sometime, seek within your hearts what you really want and one day you will find it:)

cheers!

2008-08-05T21:14:00.002+08:00

the past few days had been the darkest days of my life, i nearly couldnt survive it..

but i know i have many great friends, they have been there for me, even thou i ignored most of all the calls and smses, but they were there, worrying for me, cried for me.

thanks to all of you, everyone of you, through all your means and ways i've felt all the concern whether expressed or not..

for my support group, i love you all, thanks for braving the cold and waited for so long outside my home, im so sorry i let all of you worried..

Thanks to Grace and Eunice for your letters, really mature letters there :)

Thanks to uncle, your words of wisdom and support really made me felt so much better!

Thanks to Francis for your email, i really really appreciated it :)

It is good to know that in times like this, there are friends whom dont even ask anything and take your side. To those whom didnt, FUCK YOU all man.

i made everybody worried so much, i promise you all, it was a moment of weakness and it aint gonna happen again. i've learnt, got my mind to think it through carefully and i am no longer confused. whatever emotions left behind, i know i dont need to shoulder myself cause all of you will be there for me.

'U dont figure a way to move on, you simply decide' it is true, so true

Moving on has never been easy. i admit, i havent. But im on my way now, at least i've started the painful process. Its time to live for myself and for all those who cares.

yesterday was gone, work hard today and look forward to tomorrow.

i love all of you, i'll remember for life that all of you were there..thank you so much...

2008-08-04T13:35:00.002+08:00

i lied down on the floor, trying to sleep despite the uncontrollable tears...the immense pain i had to carry, i deserved it. i cant stop thinking how typical i was..
the whole apartment's dimmed..i shivered and cried while 'Lover Concerto' played on the laptop over and over again...at a moment of utmost weakness, the pain was too much to bear. i raised my arm and stared at my hand, my wrist. the veins were clearly visible, 2 blue veins. i was on alcohol, staggered to the kitchen and took out the knife...
i promised not to judge, but im sorry i couldnt. i hate everything, everything little decision that i made, but i hate myself the most. my mind wandered, and i imagine the vision with you being in another guy's arms. my body shivered more, tears rolled down my cheek as i stare at the knife and my wrist. There's a voice in my head, it prompts me, as if a inner self is speaking to me, 'the human body is weak, slit your wrist and you need not burden so much pain, u can be released from all these hurt and hate'. unknowingly i place the knife on my wrist, looking at the shiny surface of the metal, i saw my own face, my reflection, my pathetic wrecked face.

im losing it, any moment...any moment of weakness...yes, whats the point? what am i trying to prove? it had nothing to do with these. i ruined us, i failed. looking back at all the memories we shared, all the good times and bad times...as i read our blog entries from the first, i could vividly remember each and every time we were out, i could remember so clearly all the details, i could almost feel you beside me, cuddling and hugging me, looking into my eyes telling me how much you love me...i could feel your warmth, your passion as well as your sadness..your sorrow.. sorry for all the times i left you alone crying...for all the times i seemed so insensitive to you, for all the rubbish i uttered out when im angry...i didnt mean any of them...and i certainly didnt think there was someone better out there. There wasnt in any way i could have thought of cheating on you, or stop loving you...

some decisions cannot be taken back, some decisions change things. Worst of all, i made that decision. now im 7 hours away, feeling so helpless. there was nothing i can do, i see no point continuing to work for a future without you with me...i can achieve
anything i want, but i've already lost you. as i lost you, im losing myself. we were suppose to be one...

-How gentle is the rain
that falls softly on the meadow
Birds high up on the trees
serenade the clouds with their melodies
Oh
See there beyond the hill
the bright colors of the rainbow
some magic from above
Made this day for us
just to fall in love
You'll hold me in your arms
and say once again you'll love me
And that your love is true
everything will be just as wonderful
Now
I belong to you
from this day until forever
Just love me tenderly
and I'll give to you every part of me
Oh
Don't ever make me cry
through long lonely nights without us
Be always true to me
Keep this day in your heart eternally
You hoid me in your arms
and say once again you love me
And that your love is true
everything will be just as wonderful-

2008-08-04T07:36:00.002+08:00

so often we hear that people only know how to cherish when they lose something, now im feeling like that.

i was wrong, so wrong..all the while i thought i've been giving in..never did i spare a thought for her..shes only 20..shes just a girl..

i dont have much experience with relationships..i failed terribly this time...what am i? what have i done?

im a guy...though i have my insecurities and all, im still the guy..and a guy ought to carry his and her burden on his very shoulder...all her cries..her sorrows...im guilty..im...

there were so much more i could have done..but i didnt..there were so much more i should have done...but i didnt..

im all the way in australia..what am i doing here...im lost without an aim...im lost without my love...

so many times..i could have just cool it and listened..and understood.. i should have...for if i love her, i should love the way she is...i should not expect her to change, but i should change for her...i should live with who she is, and not expect her to be what i want her to be...

it wasnt her fault for who she was, it was my fault for not tolerating enough, i should have assured her infinitely, i should have given in to her, if she didnt like me meeting girls, i shouldnt have..i should have done everything i could to help her...but i didnt. i was defensive, i always thought i could strike a balance between r/s and friendship...i shouldnt have. i should have done everything she wanted me to, i should have done everything to make her happy...im such an idiot...

our memories...us...our promise...im weak..i dont deserve a relationship nor a girl like you...i was never good enough, and i didnt try to be...

for now i want to sink..i want to sink so deep that i can never stand up again...i punish myself, for all the wrong things i've done, for all the cries u've been through..for all the tough times and everything...i punish myself...i hate myself for who i am, i hate the way i am, im disgusted. u deserve someone better...u deserve someone who will change for you...thou at this point of time i regret and would give anything...its too late...its too late...i face the consequences...and i'll make sure i never pick myself up again...

i love you...i love you...i wish i could tell you...i wish i could sing for you again...i wish...i wish...

get drunk, wake up and get drunk again..this way..i'll never be sober enough...i'll never have to wake up from my dreams to realize we're not together again...if its possible, i want to be drunk every moment...

2008-08-04T03:58:00.000+08:00

LeTTing Go..

Someone said... "Wallets are a lot like girls. You really have to take good care of, because if you won't, something might happen"...
I know what he means. I just lost a wallet, and I just lost a girl. You know, it's the exact same thing.
One day, you just realize it's gone. You try to look for it everywhere, even going back to the places where you could have lost it.
You think, and you think hard, only to come upon a grim realization: it's really gone.
Of course, you can hold on to some hope. After all, there have been some very, very lucky (blessed?) people who get it back.
Perhaps you could become one of those people. You sit home and you hope that someone would call, and that you would get it back. But then, some time passes, and you realize that it's still gone, and you realize that it's time to let go.
The first few days, you turn to your friends for support. Some tell you you'll be ok, some tell you that it was your fault and that you should have been more careful, and some tell you about their own experiences.
They give you all sorts of advice, none you haven't heard before.
You then go out to find a new wallet, only to realize that you don't really want a new one. You want the old one that you lost.
No, you don't want all these better-looking wallets, you want yours, because of how comfortable it is, because of all the cards and pictures and other stuff in it.
You go out and carry on without a wallet, keeping your money in your pocket instead. You throw away stuff that you would have held on to if you had your old wallet. And then, finally, you find a new wallet you like and settle in.
You then start filling your new wallet, little by little. It still doesn't feel as comfortable as the old one, but it's getting there.
Then you start putting in cards and pictures and other important stuff in the wallet. Soon enough, there's as much stuff in your new wallet as the old one. And then, after some time, you feel as comfortable with your new wallet.
And then you realize that you've almost forgotten you ever had your old wallet. Sure, you still remember most of the stuff you lost on that wallet. But then again, you don't remember the feeling of hurt that you felt when you lost it.
That's because that wallet you lost is no longer your wallet. You're no longer holding on. This new wallet you're holding, it has all the important cards and pictures and stuff that you need. This is your wallet.
And this time, you tell yourself, you're never losing this one...

i dont want a new wallet, i never wanted one.

secret

2008-07-31T21:59:00.002+08:00

I can't explain how happy you make me, how much you mean to me, how much i love you...

I have never been as happy as i have been these last 2 years with you...

You're what keeps me going when things suck, the first thing i think of in the morning,
and the last thing i think of at night...

And it's not the sex that's made me so happy (although that certainly doesnt hurt)..its LOVING you.

新不了情

2008-07-29T19:11:00.001+08:00

心若倦了泪也干了
这份深情难舍难了
曾经拥有天荒地老
已不见你暮暮与朝朝
这一份情永远难了
愿来生还能再度拥抱
爱一个人如何厮守到老
怎样面对一切我不知道
回忆过去痛苦的相思忘不了
为何你还来拨动我心跳
爱你怎么能了今夜的你应该明了
缘难了情难了

Bally bag

2008-07-29T18:37:00.002+08:00

i rushed down to Bally at Collin street with Joy during lunch. saw the OH-SO-GOOD Bally bag! black leather...sleek and so omg! so i went ahead and told the sales person i wanted to purchase the bag. GUESS WHAT ? there was another same bag without the sling, and she told me if i didnt need the sling, i could get the bag at another 10% DISCOUNT! AND YES! for a over 1200bucks bag, i bought it for 580!

math 2 lect was damn crappy..it was more difficult than i expected..oh well

went to Bourke street after math 2 lect, had dinner at a HK cafe..the food is really not bad!

my phy tuition teacher is coming next sunday! omg with my oasics shoes! finally, i can commence some serious training..WE WILL ALL GET THIN AND HOT TOGETHER GUYS!

i have some mime presentation tml but shit lar i havent started brainstorming for ideas..this is so sucky cause i cant act for nuts seriously

the rational decision always hurts more..

-I miss you. i wish i could tell you, i wish i could tell anyone.

Its not that i couldn't live without you, I could.
Its just, what would be the point?-

retail therapy

2008-07-28T19:07:00.004+08:00

oh yes look at the title. well i didnt buy much stuff over the weekend..only a Tiffany & Co. Elsa Peretti pen (black) and a Fred Perry jacket..hiak hiak hiak

Im gonna get that Bally brown leather bag tml..cost a bomb but oh well PLEASE look at the title again! all these stuff's gonna cost me over 1k AUD but anyways WHO FUCKING CARE?

yes thats right, who fucking care anyway.

4 things in my mind only.

1)diet
2)train
3)shop
4)study

NOTE: The list is not in order of IMPORTANCE

yes, by Feb when i come back, i will not be who i was, i will be a brand new me, just like i had a brand new start here.

although mine didnt work, i still hope others will.

so Van babe, stay strong and hopeful, u will tide through this difficult time and one day he will understand.

this world is screwed seriously.

-i fell for you, now how do i get up?
i let you walk all over me (its because i love you)-

TRINITY BALL

2008-07-20T08:49:00.002+08:00

the title actually speaks pretty much everything. there is a ball for trinity students in OCTOBER!

which is only TWO months away!

HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW HOW?!

SCHOOL

2008-07-08T16:11:00.002+08:00

alright! it has been a week here in melbourne..everything is great! the city, people and all :)

2nd day of school today..just chose my subjs, will be taking 2 Maths and Physics, along with Core subj like english and history of ideas.

Had my first english lit lect, which is english today. it was horribly disgusting..i couldnt understand anything..it was like ZOMG WTF in my mind throughout the entire hour..worse still, this has to be one of the four best subj included in my score...holy F***!

btw, my birthday jus passed a few days to myself so..belated happy birthday martin!

AND thanks all who wished my happy birthday, CURSE THOSE WHO FORGET T_T HOW CAN ANYONE FORGET MARTIN'S BIRTHDAY!!!?

i bought myself a black ipod nano as birthday present.. a pretty neat and cool device, am really enjoying it, listening to mp3s and all!

i really do miss my girlfriend :(i miss her i miss her i miss her!

and i also miss all the martell, arcades and coffee sessions at spinelli, as well as dota at cyberdome..oh gawd i miss alllllll these stuff :(

well, for once in life i have to be fast. fast fast fast to everything, especially studies, 1 year course cramped into half a year, everything needs to be done chop chop and fast fast!

so fast

2008-06-30T23:40:00.003+08:00

i cant believe myself! after all that crazy midnight arcade sessions, even crazier martell drinking sessions week after week, the time has finally come.

im leaving tml for melbourne, the excitment has really died down tremendously, whats left now is really a lot alot of 不舍.

I would like to thank all of u guys who came down yest, thou it was uhm 10 people and like ky said, 22 years old with only 10 frens -.-

but then again since ky make up to 1000 and seeyun make up to 2000, i shouldnt feel too bad at all :)

anyways, the past few weeks has been extremely fun with you guys, especially my girlfriend darling who's such a sweetheart, trying to perfect everything for me!

i apologise if i looked really sian or kind of down cause inevitably i feel quite upset inside to leave all of you.

Well, there is a time for everything. Fun is over, its time to study!

i am really really not looking forward to studying BUT this is something i have to achieve this time, a do or die situation. of course along with so many best wishes, im sure it will turn out just fine.

Need loads of discipline, including slinging my water bottle with homemade cappuccino and read book while walking to school, munching on homemade sandwiches.

This time, its not only about grades, its about EVERYTHING.

so guys, be glad im gone for 6 mths, cause that means YOUR liverS has 6 mths to rest!

once im back, i'll make sure we spoil our livers again with endless poker/dice/5-10/MARTELL sessions!

Special thanks to darling for the cup cakes and all the effort put in to plan :)

Special thanks to seeyun for the ice wine :)

less than 1 mth

2008-06-09T03:30:00.002+08:00

havent been noticing as days passed so quickly! now that i look at the date, i realize theres only less than 1 mth left before i fly over...

have been feeling rather uneasy about flying over recently..theres just this strange feeling lingering around thou at times im rather excited too..

i really need to learn how to stay within budget..im totally out of control when it comes to budget..-_-

sometimes when u look back and realize how different u are now compared to the past, or how different your frens become...we are constantly changing, nobody can remain the same, whether major or minor changes, we are all in this on going process of changing.

love was never meant to be perfect, being in love does not mean being happy everyday.
but 2 person truly in love can strive to tide through gd times and bad times, love thou isnt perfect, is magical. To be in love is all about taking risks. But it is the courage to be in love despite the many uncertainties ahead that makes love utmost beautiful.

If u give up, u'll lost it. But if u try, there will always be chances.

the next few years will be difficult, but with much understanding, trust, compromise, patience and love, im sure we'll survive. lets not take it for granted anymore and walk the path of life hand in hand.

darling, jeg elsker deg.

im bored

2008-05-15T02:19:00.002+08:00

have been slacking at home these days..im so so bored!

now everybody's like so busy and im like the only one who's so free...my gawd..-_-

many many random thoughts everyday..well i guess when ure too free your mind jus wonders around lol..

anyways, i'll be really really looking forward to Christmas this year..thou i might be having final exams right after xmas..it'll be so fun!

my mind is turning blank.....zzzzzz

睡不着。。。

2008-05-08T06:40:00.000+08:00

什麼是愛，愛又是什麼？

矢之不渝，海枯石烂，天崖海角真的存在吗？

我曾经以为我非常了解爱情，到现在才发现，原来我对爱情一无所知。

还是。。。今朝有酒今朝醉，明日愁来明日忧。

為什麼？？

2008-05-08T01:46:00.000+08:00

當希望變失望，失望變絕望時，你們會怎麼做呢？

money

2008-05-07T13:20:00.000+08:00

錢錢錢！錢不夠用啊！

leaving in less than 2 mths

2008-05-07T01:28:00.000+08:00

thats right, im leaving in less than 2 mths. One part of me really looks forward to going over to Melbourne and yet the other part just dreads it so much.

think about all the fun, being alone in another country, away from family and friends, the excitement of exploring and adapting to a new lifestyle, a new experience.

of course when u're alone, sometimes days could get really grey and u just wish you have your love ones beside you telling you everything's gonna be fine and ok..yet all i've got is my laptop, internet, webcam and skpe..

anyways, the decision has been made along with much determination..going overseas to study is definitely not cheap and i wouldnt want to waste my parent's money.

Went for phy tuition at parkway today..and uncle just bought a new sony digi cam! i was really really tempted looking at T300..its so sleek and attractive but unfortunately selling for $649 which i could hardly afford right now..damn!

paid my $195 phone bill finally and sad to say im near to broke again...gawd money always come fast and go fast...wheres my daddy ??

Really need to get started on revision for foundation studies, some say its easy, some say it isnt. so which ever it is, its always better to be prepared least i have difficulty adapting over there which hinders my progress..im taking the fast track which finishes the actual 1 year foundation to 1/2 year. the schedule will be very very packed cause i even have lessons on sat..its gonna be pure mug for 6 mths and hopefully next year FEB i can make it into Uni melbourne..need to obtain at least 84% and above to get into commerce.

the shopping and drinking craze is kicking in again..as much as im left with so little cash...argh..accepted a job at expo, food fair promoter for 5 days..the money's quite gd but i gotta stand like 11 hours per day for 5 days..heh

gonna need to do some shopping for clothes and some necessities to bring over there..hmm..

im just so gonna miss everybody when im over there :(